KMK: Life Water

In the niche market of bottled water there remains a plethora of options to choose from in the Korean corner store. However, I have recently taken to the aptly named Life Water. Yeah, it sort of hits you over the head with the name, but I’ve come to accept the blunt in your face nature of Korean advertising.

Nothing too subtle about Life Water. Even better is the description on the label which reads as follows:

If you are like me and didn’t enjoy high school biology classes, you are probably not aware of oxygen free radicals. These oxygen free radicals damage body cells and tissues and may contribute to aging. Is there any way to reduce these oxygen free radicals? Of course there is! We now have vitamein E which can help reduce oxygen free radicals. PROTECT YOUR LIFE

Now there is all kinds of wrong going on in that little bit of advertising. First, way to assume your consumer base is a bunch of ignorant high school biology class drop outs. And they get no points for trying to empathize with the ‘if you are like me’ piece of malarkey. Second, they get way too much mileage out of the Oxygen Free Radicals line. Those three little word are repeated more than the name of the drink. Third, did they invent Vitamin E? It sure seems as if they’re taking credit for it. Fourth, PROTECT YOUR LIFE comes across as a tad dramatic, yes? I was waiting for the Protect Your Life or Die From Oxygen Free Radicals bouncing around your cells and killing you from the inside!!!!

Maybe they’re waiting to add that for the diet version. Anyway, Life Water is alright if you must quench your thirst and nothing else is nearby. It beats a coke, I guess.

Remember: PROTECT YOUR LIFE